Bouncing Back from Brokenness

Dear Friends,

Adversity is an inevitable part of life, and resilience is the ability to mentally and emotionally cope with and recover from adversity. In fact, resilience is the cornerstone of your personal power.

Why You Need Resilience

Pressing through hardships and overcoming challenges gives us greater belief in ourselves and our ability to bounce back from brokenness. Resiliency equips us to not only face future challenges, but to develop essential life skills that help us to be more effective and efficient. As our resilience increases, so does our coping skills, patience, awareness, confidence and support systems. We inspire those around us and are better equipped to navigate any obstacles we face.

The Power of Resilience

Psychologists have studied the link between resilience and personal power and identified five (5) aspects of resilience that support personal power: (1) focusing on the present supports faith in yourself; (2) learning from your failures supports self-acceptance; (3) positive thinking supports courage in your principles; (4) stress management supports authenticity; and (5) changed perspective supports choosing your response. Let's take a look at each aspect.

1. Focusing on the Present Supports Faith in Yourself

Resilience requires focusing on the present. You can’t be resilient if you distract yourself from your goals by worrying about the past or future. Learning to focus on the present supports your personal power by understanding and giving you faith in yourself. Since you can’t change the past, you need to focus on what you can do now to improve your future. Believing that you have the power to shape your future shows your personal control.

2. Learning from Your Failures Supports Self-Acceptance

Instead of blaming others, resilient people understand how they contributed to a failure. Resilient people are willing to examine their life and look for ways to overcome difficulty.  They use mistakes as opportunities to learn and grow.

Acknowledging your role in failure also allows you to own your part in success.  Self-acceptance means you have worked hard to understand yourself, including your strengths and weaknesses.  When you learn from your failures, you build the self-awareness that leads to self-acceptance.  Because you accept yourself, your personal power is built on your resilience to life’s obstacles.

3. Positive Thinking Supports Courage in Your Principles

Even when bad things happen, resilient people think positively by looking for ways to resolve and overcome obstacles. They don’t let others define their opinions or principles.  Because resilient people stay focused on positive outcomes, they aren’t easily swayed by the negative views of others.  When you think positively, your principles are based on knowing you can and will succeed.  Your belief in yourself creates personal power.

4. Stress Management Supports Authenticity

Resilient people experience stressful situations in life. Instead of letting stress overwhelm them, they have learned to manage their lives to work through stress.  Resilient people understand that not everything that causes stress is horrible or never-ending.  Stress can be a motivator and teacher too. 

Knowing how to process stress and work through it supports your personal power and being yourself.  Because a resilient person doesn’t allow other’s expectations of them to cause stress, they are free to be who they are.  In fact, being true to yourself often causes less stress once you learn to feel comfortable with your opinions and principles.  Being yourself builds your personal power and allows you to take the time needed to recharge, grow, and achieve.

5. Changed Perspective Supports Choosing Your Response

Personal power isn’t about control over others. Personal power is control over yourself.  Resilient people’s positive perspective of learning, growing, and living in the present supports the ability to choose the best response to any situation.  Choosing your personal response without interference from negative forces is the definition of personal power.

It’s impossible to build and maintain personal power without resilience. As the cornerstone of personal power, resilience provides the skills of focusing on the present, learning and growth, positive thinking, and stress management.

These skills change your perspective and support your personal power by helping you chose your response despite outside influences by building faith in yourself and your principles, self-acceptance, and the courage to be yourself and chose your best outcome.

Want to Build Your Resilience?

Resilience is a learned pattern of behavior that can be nurtured, developed and improved. Our mini-course introduces the concept of resilience, explores the nature of resilience, and outlines practical strategies that you can use to build resilience and thrive in the face of adversity. Engaging exercises will help you to assess your current resiliency and learn how to more effectively deal with the inevitable difficult circumstances that life brings your way. Check it out here: Building Resilience & Finding Meaning in Adversity.

Until Next Time,

Dr. Mary



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